Category: Judgment

0

If Your Heart Were Truly Open


During difficult times I am reminded of conversations with God and the devil. As strange as that may seem, the message from both are lessons I will never forget. Almost seven years ago, the day before Thanksgiving, a friend of mine who lived on the other side of the world woke up from a dead sleep and felt compelled to message me three words, “Divide and Conquer.” During that time period I had already begun writing, but it was fairly infrequent. But when I saw those words, it was different. I began writing and writing and I could not stop. I literally wrote for hours from almost 10am to 4:30pm that day. I only stopped because I needed to pick up my son from daycare.

On the way to day care, I prayed to God and I asked Him in my heart, “Why can’t I stop writing?” In that moment, I felt a peace come over me. I heard/felt the words, “If your heart were truly open, would you ever want it to stop?” As I felt those words something happened. I could literally feel every emotion of everyone. I could feel love, pain, anger, hate, happiness, all of it. I could feel all of it all at once as if each thought and emotion were in some ether floating around, waiting to be felt, waiting to be expressed. It was all there, but it was not overwhelming. It was as if they simply existed, all without judgment. There was no good or bad. They were just expressions, existence. There were just the words I associated with what I saw. Just as I could feel the peace and I tried to hold onto it, it disappeared. It was still there but as soon as I tried to attach my understanding, and my perception to it, it disappeared. From that day onward, I would continue to write.

Sometime after that I had another “conversation.” In a dream I had seen the devil. There was no fear, anger or hate. There was simply understanding. In a dark room I could see the outline of a door. As I opened the door, I could see a figure. A light seemingly coming from nowhere shown upon this figure. I recognized him to be the devil. It was as if he was frozen by the light. He was not able to move, except to speak. I asked him, “Why are you the way you are?” Not expecting any response, he answered me. He simply said, “I forgot who I was. I forgot where I came from.” I could see remorse, and sadness. His burden was to see and feel the fruit of the seeds he had sown. In him, I saw myself and mankind. We have forgotten who we are. We have forgotten the light, and the way. And in doing so, it was as if we turned our backs on God.

Upon waking from this dream, I was instantly reminded of my conversation with God. “If my heart were truly open, why would I ever want it to stop?” Why would anyone want to turn their back on God? I have looked back on these moments. I often ask myself could I have done something different to continue feeling that peace? What can I do to come to that state of mind? But in trying to grasp at what we think we know and by trying to label those things that we think we understand, we judge. We judge our experiences by those of others. We judge every aspect of life. We judge our grief, our pain, and our losses. We judge our love, our happiness, and our gains. We judge and we lose sight.

0

God’s Measuring Stick


We are not God’s measuring stick. Though we may feel it is our duty to spread what we deem to be God’s word, let not our egos drive us. Let us not assume the will of God for He shall light the spark and ignite the flame in our heart.

All too too often God is used as a weapon. We use God to divide rather than to bring together. Elohim. From many we are one. It is through this understanding that we shall find God.

In the ghettos, in the wicked, in the hearts of the devout, on mountain tops, in the desert, and in every being we shall find God. Each of us are the face of God. We are the innocent, the disenchanted, the lonely; we are all part of God.

We are each other’s keeper. When we close our eyes and walk away, or when we turn our heads and mutter words of disgust under our breath, it is not man whom we turn our backs to, but it is God’s. We are like two faces of the same hand. We are one in the same.

0

Virtue


I don’t write as often as I used to and that is by design. We each walk into this world with our own challenges and tests. We are different after all. We are born into different circumstances, speak different languages, and are faced with different hurdles in life. Regardless of those differences, we are more alike than we sometimes see or hope to be.

For me, my challenge has always been that I have a hard time when others cannot see the world as I do. I have a logical mind. I have always been this way. I have the ability to break down problems into their discrete parts, and by that virtue find a solution to problems, or perceived problems. I see the paths, in, through and out of situations. I see people in very much the same way. That in itself is my gift, my problem and my challenge. I can break people apart into their smallest parts, their motivations, their fears, their hopes, and their desires. I see these things in relation to their environment and the circumstances from which they come. I can see these things in regards to the relationships they have with others. Regardless of this, people are more than their fears, hopes and desires. They are more than the things they show, or even the things they hide.

And so in seeing people in this way, it’s easy to dismiss what others may see as a challenge. Seeing people in this way is a double edged sword. In one hand it can be used to manipulate people, to use people against themselves. By understanding how one’s fears and motivations drive them, they can be driven to do things they would not normally wish for themselves. Also by the same virtue, by understanding their hopes, they can be driven to be the best person they can be.

Today, I choose to write, not to be above others, or to convince others. I write because it is what my heart drives me to do. I write because in the end, you and I are the more than just alike. We are the same. We are One.

0

Walking a Few Steps


We all have different personalities so it’s sometimes difficult to understand why people do the things they do. It’s easy to see someone doing something and call it stupid. But is it stupid because we couldn’t imagine ourselves doing the same thing, or because we see someone struggling with something going on in their life? Rather than judge why a person is doing something, maybe it’s just better to ask how someone is doing, if not for curiosity, to actually help.

We have to remember that we all have things in our lives that are challenges to us. What may seem small to us may be a huge challenge for someone else, and that’s okay. We all come from different walks of life and have had to deal with different things. Our lessons in life are all different. So perhaps rather than questioning or ridiculing someone’s decisions or actions, lend a hand.

Try to walk a few steps with someone, but not so you can make them more like you, but so they can really be themselves. It’s amazing what can happen when we carry the load together.

0

All the Faces Staring Back


Faces StaringI stand in the subway watching all the faces. That one looks tired. That one is old and wrinkly. That one smells funny. That one is dressed in raggedy clothes. There’s a business person with a smug face. There’s a girl with half her head shaved. What must have she been thinking? There’s a hot look woman. That guy looks like he’s a douche-bag. That one is talking out of his ass.

I make all of these judgments and it says nothing about these people and everything about me. In less than a few seconds my fears are revealed. I see parts of myself in all of these people. The discomfort is palpable. I close my eyes, not to hide from them but to hide from myself. The train ride is prolonged. I have not reached the end of the tracks.

The air is suffocating and it doesn’t have to be. I know these people no more than I choose to know myself. Everything is at the surface and it need not be. Struggles past and struggles to come, I see my past, present and future and it does not have to be.

They are all me and I am them. We’re on this journey together and that’s just the way it has to be.

See you at the end of the tracks.

0

Forgiveness From the Ashes


Flaming Lightning Blade: Phoenix HeartForgiveness is not about forgetting nor is it about denial. Forgiveness is about relinquishing control. It’s about releasing pain that has manifested as anger and resentment. It is about releasing a self inflicted burden.

Like shackles that bind our feet, pain ties us to our current condition. Without forgiveness, whether of another or oneself, we become stuck in a vicious cycle of pain and resentment. With forgiveness or some would say godliness, we have a way out, a way forward.

It grants us the power, not over another, but over our own destiny. We don’t have to live in pain. We don’t have to live in misery. We need only realize that in all matters of the spirit we can choose a destructive path, or one that raises us from the ashes.

From the ashes I rise. From the ashes I forgive myself.

0

The Nature of Man


Adam and GodShould a wolf be rewarded for its cunningness? Should a snake be punished for its ability to strike without being seen? Who is above the fray that they should judge whether one is deserving of a reward or punishment? Who is holy enough that they should cast judgment on one’s nature, and one’s ability to please God?

We each live our lives, hopefully by the best of our intentions, but does this make us the maker of kings and the deliverer of justice? We are no better and no worse than our highest ideals and our lowest of lows. Happiness does not come from denying happiness to others. Nor does it come from shunning what we cannot understand. Happiness ultimately will come from not only accepting ourselves, but also from accepting that we cannot control others.

We can become prisoners of our own jealousy and pride, or we can set ourselves free from the seemingly endless critiques and judgments. Perhaps in writing this or even in contemplating this aspect of our nature, we can be hypocritical, but is it not better to accept and move on from one’s faults, rather than claiming none ever existed in the first place?

0

Identify!


If you could put your identity to the side, would you be willing to live and be who you are? What would you call yourself? Would you still claim a nation as your home, a religion as your foundation, and a god as your God? Who would claim your allegiance if allegiances were to be made? Who would hold your ear when a story needed to be told?

Who are you? Most can agree we are not the clothes we wear, or the job we take up, but then who are we? Many ask this question throughout their lives, while some pay no mind, and still others become who they are told to be. All the while, the question still begs to be asked, “Who am I?” Am I a mother, a father, a brother or a sister? Am I my parents’ child? Am I a policeman, a teacher or business person? Am I a stranger, a derelict or a criminal? Who am I to ask these questions? Who am I to answer them?

I am no one, and yet I am someone. I am you, and yet I am me. I am and yet I have no words to describe. Do not judge me. Just see me, for no words can do justice, nor should we attempt to confine.

0

A Moment Not Judged is a Moment Lived


There is no such thing as stability when it comes to one’s life path. It is simply trust, misplaced. We take comfort in the constructs that we create in life. We tell ourselves that if we go to school and become educated that we will have a good job when we’re finished. We tell ourselves that if we save our money that it will always be there for a rainy day. We tell ourselves that if we show loyalty to people that others will reciprocate. We tell ourselves all of these things in the hopes that it all might just come true.

We live our lives expecting a specific set of possible outcomes, but when those outcomes are different, it causes us confusion. It causes us to question our very existence. The person who sought to educate themselves is now faced with having to compete with others of a similar background for a single position. The person, who saved, is now faced with inflation that outpaces one’s savings. The person who was loyal is now faced with the realization that his loyalty meant nothing to the one he sought to impress.

Our lives are filled with similar examples of misplaced trust. When our expectations are not met, we blame others, and we blame ourselves. We become self-destructive when what we really need is to open our hearts and our minds to what truly exists, and to what truly matters.

We spend so much of our time contemplating the what-if moments, the possibilities, but we never ask ourselves, does it matter? Is the purpose of life to earn money? Is the purpose of life to try and learn every possible thing we can? Is the purpose of life to impress others? Perhaps it is none of these things. Perhaps it is simply to express oneself, to take joy in each moment, as it comes, regardless of how it we are perceived. A moment not judged, is a moment lived, and yet here we are judging ourselves each step of the way.

0

Finding Oneself Again


When we hold on to our own personal truths so tightly, it is easy to lose sight of the greater picture. In the hopes of justifying ourselves and our past actions, we can often overlook all that is around us. Clouded in our own beliefs, we can lose perspective as we begin to discount others including those we hold dear.

As we find ourselves in more self-isolation, we must ask whether we have really followed the truth, or forsaken it out of fear of being wrong, or pride for wishing to be in the right. As if to hold our arms crossed against our chest, we can often find ourselves defending something without asking “why?” Why if we have truly found inner peace do we defend something so strongly and disallow others from finding it themselves?

No amount of preaching, repetition, or immersion can force a person to understanding without first the will and the desire to understand. This comes differently in each person, but we must be patient enough to allow it to bloom in its own time and nurture it with love from all sides.

Previous Page

   

    Recent Comments

  • Mark Says:

    a walk FATHER to SON Native Legends a walk FATHER to SON “A son and his father were walking on the ...

  • Andrew Smith Says:

    LOVELY!...

  • sidewalk_bends Says:

    Thank you Slorri for sharing your view and adding another layer. I hope that others will also share ...

  • Slorri Says:

    ... adding, most of this is subconscious. Compare Jung's Collective Unconscious....

  • Slorri Says:

    As a pantheist to me the question of "What or who is God" is easy. There is no god. There is consci...

  • Bandana Says:

    Really like this atlcire. Allowing ourselves to be controlled by fear of the media, or anyone in our...

  • wincie gladish Says:

    I would really like to print some of the thoughts posted on awareness of the heart but cannot get th...

  • sidewalk_bends Says:

    Only we can free ourselves from tyranny. We are the tyrants of our own soul....

  • Me Says:

    "... the act DOES NOTHING BUT TO PLACE A LIGHT SQUARELY ON ONESELF. It is the ego, which seeks to be...

  • admin Says:

    These are comments from a mirror of this site that are pertinent to this post: Eoin: Beg to differ...

Tag Cloud

acceptance Allah anger awareness choice Christianity compassion creation Creator depression devil Divine enlightenment expectations fear forgiveness free will future God guidance happiness hate heart heaven illusion Jesus judgment knowledge life love meditation pain path peace perception philosophy prayer Religion soul spirit spirituality suffering truth unconditional love understanding